Apparently never posted this. It's from a couple of weeks ago.

Lets see how random this gets. Lol.

Questions in my head:
Will I always worry this much?
Are women really so worried about their weight that they don't like food?
Am I always going to feel like there's this empty space in my heart?
Is my journey a success so far?
Will my boy be proud of me when he grows up?
Can friendship really last forever?
Why have a I had to frickin pee so much lately?
*sidenote: no possibility of pregnancy, I promise.*
Will someone create an invention that shows you how other people see you?
Will I ever feel good about myself for an extended period of time?
Does dealing with the ups and downs of being bipolar very get easier?
Why is Law&Order so addicting?
Could my baby boy ever be any cuter?!
Will someone make me chocolate milk?
Nope...so is it worth getting up to go get it?
What does this boy want with me?
Why is he so sweet?
How can someone treat me so well without me returning those feelings/emotions/etc?
Does he truly understand I can't handle any kind of a relationship right now?
Will I ever conquer my fear?
Is that chocolate milk worth it?
Hmm....I wonder how cold it is outside...
Have a I had too many cigarettes today?
Is another worth facing the cold?
Why am I not sleeping?
Can I breathe yet?
Why is this show so damn funny?!
Why did my son suddenly slide to the floor?
Why is he sitting there?
How does he sleep in such weird positions?
If I move him tonight will he yell at me?
Awh, did he really just do that?!
He just did that. Hugs are the best and he didn't yell. Is this Heaven?
How does one become a hand model?
How do these people have such perfect skin?
Isn't anyone else proud of their scars?
Can I have a motorcycle man made of money?
Do people really talk about toilet paper yet?
Has anyone figured out that there was a commercial break?
Am I truly healing or just going crazier?
Life has to get better from here, right?
Does everything really happen for a reason?
Is anyone else tired yet?
Can anyone believe that this was my mind within less than five minutes?

Yep. Eff that. Cigarette, meditation, hopefully sleep. I'm hard at work trying to get out of this down phase I'm sure you've all noticed I've been in. Work in the morning. Grams has surgery tomorrow. Lord, there's so much on my mind...sweet dreams readers.