Where do I begin?

So much has happened the past few days, I honestly don't know where to begin. We'll start by saying that I'm not moving to my brothers. He doesn't know that yet, but I am gonna go get my stuff from there and move it back here. The people I live with have both told me that we can work through it all as friends, and I believe them. I'm safe here. And often times, with everything going on, I feel like they're my only family left. I know that this isn't true, but it's hard to explain. I feel like moving out to my brothers is a nightmare waiting to happen, and my instincts about things like that are generally spot on. I've been through too much to put myself, and more importantly my son, in that position. My baby is my everything, and I've somehow forgotten that a bit.
Anywho, went out with a friend last night. (We're gonna call you psych :) and had a blast. Got to hear their band, may post the name after I ask permission. They're good. They don't realize it yet, but there's so much potential there. After their band practice we drove around for a while and just talked about anything and everything. Also got lost finding Taco Bell because I'm directionally challenged :) It was a blast, much needed and I've missed my best friend more than I realized. Also, on to best friends. I have several best friends. They each fit into my life in different ways, they each have different qualities I love.
On to other things. I'm a mess. Absolute mess. But I'm beautiful. Messes can be beautiful and that is me. My life is a challenge, my life is a mess, my life is crazy, my life is sad, but my happy is also happy. It's my life. There is much going on, so much has happened. But I'm ending this on one note. Now, more than ever before, I just want to be me and explore what being me means.